In Part One, Josie doesn’t feel like putting on the act of pleasing her friends and teachers, have you ever felt as she does? Do you always portray who you really are or do you act as you are expected to? Explain why people conform in society and why some people fight conformity?
62 comments:
I think that everyone feels like Josie at least once in their schooling. Like, my friend, at home is a very depressing person; but in school she is one of the bounciest people you'll meet. Sometimes, when she does let her gaurd down and is herself in school, she plays it off as being tired, but if you really know her, you know that she just wants to be herslf without being called emo. It's so hard for her to do that. It hurts me when she's trying to be herself and people make fun of her for it. It's like, this is who she is if you don't like then don't be around her; don't say anything to her. She also gets really mad when people ask her what's wrong when nothing is.
~Jules :)
i feel sometimes that feeling josie felt of having to put on a show for her f\riends and the teachers but since ive had this class with mr. g and ms. carr i feel theres no need if no one will accept me for who i am then it wasnt ment to be.
-austin
i actually do what people really expect me to do. I don't however conform in the sense of wearing everything, because let's get real, i wear my hair up everyday with jeans and a regular tee shirt that's probably one of my sister's or brother's. But i do conform in the way of acting how other people expect me to act. I act all goofy everyday. Which is me, but somedays i just want to sit there and just really be there, not noticed. But I usually always put my mouth in things and say something stupid that i would regret, then just go back to sitting in the corner and say another stupid thing all over again. Like last week was really hard for me because my aunt had died. I spent all night with her in the hospital before her passing. We had a pretty akward visit because she had tried to commit suicide that day. When i had heard the news i didnt want to go to school at all. But like i do everyday i always act out with my actions, trying to show people that im fine. I pretty much do that everyday, but now since im so used to having something bad happen to me and then putting on a front, its become my personality. How do you change that?
I used to put on an act for people however, it was just simply just because I wanted them to like me. So I acted as though what I thought they would want in a friend, this was middle/end of 6th grade, half of 7th grade. And the situation I had...that I described in my loneliness post, but anyway, now I have my friends where I don't catch myself doing it as much anymore.
However, I don't think I have been in the position that Josie has been in like that...maybe in my old group, but now not at all. You should be somewhere where you feel comfortable, but I do understand Josie's problem with it.
I think people conform in society because they want to feel excepted by people (like me) and they don't want people to make fun of them for who they really are. So they just go with the flow and play it safe. It also depends on the level of confidence you have.
~Hayley~
Ya know I've said this before that my friends are my actual friend that I can hang out with and tell them things that bother me. Most of them are always with me and will never turn on me, but some teachers I act really nice to and try to act like a real teachers pet just cause if I don't they might eat me. In that class I really do change into what i'm not but it that or a detention in her mind. In other classes too I try and act all smart so people that don't really know me don't think i'm an idiot. Most people think that cause I hang out with people who aren't the smartest in the world( hope you guys don't hate me for saying this). All my friends friends know i'm smart, and they make fun of me and say "oh watch out for this guy" or "we gotta smarty pants over here" but I know they are just foolin around. I got a little off topic but to conclude my post I have to say that I do compromise the way I am only when its needed or if i'm making a first impression. :)MATT(:
Yes sometimes I have felt like Josie. I used to be the "acting" type but most of the time I am basicly myself. But there is no need to "act", its good to just be yourself. I hope that people can be themeselves. Like Austin said ever since I have been in Mr.G and Ms.Carrs class I can always be myself. I do and don't act like I am expected to. To tell you the truth I wish we didn't have to "act" because it would be nice to just be yourself and see how people act to see the true you!!! (: I think that people conform because they dont think that they would "fit in". Some people fight it because they like to be different and not put on an "act" for people, they want to be themselves. One day, I say that we, mr.G and Ms.carrs class should just dress how we want,do whatever,be ourselves,and just not "act".
~Theresa
Nice post Matt. And I think nearly everyone changes their atitude when making a first impression.
Jon H.
to be honest, i think that everybody feels that way... everybody wants to dress up as they would on weekends and dress to be themselves. instead, we all put masks on almost like a secret identity. most of the time, all i want to do is throw on a sweat shirt and sweat pants, why should it matter what we dress like when everyone feels the same thing? people fight being themselves, because they're afraid they won't be accepted... but by who? the different clicks? i'd like to know why people should have to hide their true selves. we can all be ourselves in front of real friends... or in mr.g and ms.carrs class, but when we step out of the classroom it's almost like we step into a fighting rink. we get "pushed down" and the longer we stay down the harder it is to get back up. like peter, all his life he wanted to be accepted and he was so confident until matt took his superman lunchbox and chucked it out the window... that's when it all started and peter never really got back up from that "knock out".
-alexis(:
alexis,
i get what your saying. almost everybody dresses up nice for other people. not much me though ha cuz ive worn basketball shorts every single day or sweatpants and always were the same sweatshirts. i do this cuz thats what im comfortable with. my friends like me for who i am and not how i dress. in the end thats all that matters.
-Haas
I agree with Nick, the stuff i wear isnt really for anyone else but myself. althogh i am a follower. the way i dress has been the same for a wile. and my true friends dont care how i look or what i wear. then again guys dont really care how other guys dress.
Brett Blancha
Yes i have felt like Josie throughout my life mainly in school or out in public not so much at home though. I mainly portray who people want me to be. I think alot of people conform in society because they are afraid of what people will think of the person that they really are, and every body just wants to fit in some where, no body wants to be alone (or the hippo). I think that some people try to fight conformity because they feel that if they are like that there has to be other people out in the world that are like them weather it be their neighbor or some guy in china or they have had some thing very tramatizing happen to them and they just want to be alone for their whole life so they be who they really are if they are stingy.
-Kyle Abrams
I dont put on any act to please anyone, not even teachers. I think people coform because they are trying to show people who they arent, they are trying to show them someone different. And alot of people conform to get a "group" to accept them. When really if you have/ had true friends it shouldn't matter if your trying to fit dress a certain way. You should be able to dress, and act how you want. And Josie isnt able to do that. She has to dress how her friends act and act how her friends act just so that she doesnt lose her friends, and they shouldnt judge her when she just wants to wear sweatpants to school. She should also be able to be her normal self and not someone her friends want her to be.
~~michaela howell(:
I believe some poeple put on a fake face or look becuase if they arnt themselves they won't be as cool or as popular. Becuase they believe if you are yourself you art cool. You have to be a certian way ad if you art that certain way you don't fit in. I think this is why people do this.
Zach Wood
i have definatly felt like josie. I wake up everyday and play out my day in my head so that i dont mess up or embarrass myself or do something stupid. I am very self concious and i dont think i am ever myself inside of school. i dont think even my closest frinds know the real me, because i am only me in my own home.
~Autumn <33
I think most people conform to make a good first impression. I think that most people don't care though. At least, that's my opinion. I try not to conform at all. And sometimes it's hard. I think I do a good job. And I can say for certain that I know of several people who are very good at saying "hey, this is who I am and if you don't like it, goodbye."
Hanes
I agree with Autumn, sometimes i put on an act and act like someone im not. i try not to but it just happenes.I feel as if people see the real me then they wont like it. but ever since ive been in this calss its help me open up and be myself, and if people dont like it then honestly i dont care. i never said you had to like me.
-nichole(:
i don't really know if i am myself... i remember the real me was when i was younger, but once i came here and had to start over, the old me got lost and i started to change to make new friends because i wanted them to like me. i try to be me now but i'm not sure if i fully am... i think some people conform in society because they are afraid that nobody will like the real them, so they change themself to fit in with the rest. others go against it because they have their head on right and want to be true even if they aren't excepted that way...
-jessica s :)
I agree with Jess. I don't know if I am being myself. I know that I'm not being fake, but I'm still trying to find me.In the 5th and 6th grade I wasn't myself at all. I would try to be what people wanted me to be and act like a sidekick instead of looking for real friends.But as of right now I am deffinatly trying to be more me and less what people want me to be.
Leah O. :))
I feel that in a way I put on an act. I wear the clothes that everyone has told me to wear so that I can "fit in", but I act exactly the same at home as I do in school(most of the time). I don't really care if I do something that others don't approve of, I just try to be myself as much as I can because I'd rather want people to know me for who I am, so I don't constantly have to play a roll for anybody. I think that people try to conform because they feel that that is the only way to fit in, but others fight it because they feel that they need to be their own person. I feel that I try to be more of a person who doesn't want to be like any one else because I don't need to be like everyone else. I want to be defined as Jackie and no one else.
This is jackie i forgot to sign
-jackie
Autumn,
Love what you said, and your right i probably don't know you for who you are(:
~Jackie
Jackie,
haha. yeah. i dont think anyone does :(
~Autumn <33
I usually act like im suppose to act. i never let it out, i keep my feelings in at home b/c thats the only place where i would be alone example- my bedroom is mostly where i would be if im upset. Most people conform to society b/c they dont wanna make scenes near people cuz then they'll know he/she is upset. when people dont conform, that shows that their weak and they cant help it. i know some people that dont conform and its very hard and upseting to them.
-Katiee(:
Autumn,
Well you should allow people to see you for who you really are... don't hide :(
~Jackie
I have felt like Josie before but not as pressured. I try to not change myself for anyone. If people don't like who I am I really dnt care because I am who I am and my true friends dnt care what I look like. I think people try to hard to fit in by acting different or dressing different. If you have to change yourself to hangout with someone you shouldn't because you should hangout with people like you
for you.
Luke
I am myself when I'm at home and with my friends, but when I'm not with any of my friends I subconciously conform. I think people conform because they're not comfortable with who they are, so they act differently. People who fight conformity are people who are trying to become themselves all the time and (like me)subconciously change themselves.
-Ben
I have felt like Josie before in my life. But now with my friends really dont care what i wear or anything like that. Honestly i would and usually do wear sweatpants everyday of the week. Unlike in mean girls where they can only where sweatpants once a week. But mostly all of the drama with what you wear is with girls and not guys.
D@n 0
I think that everyone hides who they really are at one point or another. We just dont relize that we are doing it. We only do it so that other people will accept us but we should'nt to that we should be who we really are and if other people can not accept us for who we really are well then who cares about them. If they will not get to know you for who you really are they don't deserve to get to know you at all.
Shawn M
I really agree with Autumn on some of the stuff she said but i think my closest friends do know the real me.How i act around them is ALOT different from the way i act at school.Its because Im so us to my friends and they dont jugde me. Most of my friends are my friends from kindergardan and 1st grade.Sometimes i wish i act same way at home and at school.
Leah D.
Most of the time I act like myself, and other times I don't. I hate when people get the impression that I'm annoying because I talk so much. It just hurts when you're trying to be yourself then just get put down. People try to conform with society because sadly the way 8th graders treat each other is not with kindness.
~HaLeY :]
I think everyone uses school as a mask to hide behind. Most people don't act the same in school as they do at home. In school you can create yourself as a totally different person then you are. I think once people start school they loose a part of who they are. As much as I would like to say I'm always myslef and I don't care what people think I can't say that and be honest. Not just as a teenager in school, but adults put on a mask in society too. People have to much of an idea of how they're expected to act without getting some sort of a bad reputation, but then again I can't blame them because in a minute people can create a bad reputation for you. Once that spreads people whom you've never met can have a totally different view of you before they even give you a chance. in school and society you get judged, you just have to learn not to care. So far from what I'm learning, its not easy.
K. Siggy
Most people have put on that different mask. Like I know alot of people like to joke around about anything. And most people have to make sure that you don't say something that is something they can make a joke about, because than sometimes the people will kinda rag on you for what you said. I think am going off topic but it is almost like a war. You have to protect yourself anyway you can. I do a little bit of both with just being yourself or putting on that fake mask. I think that all of this goes back to defending yourself and others if you can.
I deffinetly feel like Josie sometimes. Its like i want to just throw my hair in a pony tail, put on sweats and go to school. But, something makes me straiten my hair, and put together an outfit. I think everyone feels like this once in a while. With me I think I get scared that people might just see the real Emilee and not like it. I like what Jackie said, i just want to me Emilee Maira, not what people what me to be.
emilee(:
I think everyone puts on a mask everyday for school, including myself. Everyday i straighten my hair because if i dont, then it just looks like i woke up and didnt do anything with it. which is sometimes just what i want to do, wake up and put my hair in a pony tail and leave for school. i mean thats what we did when we were in the elementery school. why is it that when you hit middle school you just have to straighten your hair everyday and put on makeup or your called lazy? Also, when im having the worst morning and i just want to wear sweats, i dont because even when you do wear sweats, you still have to look good so whats the point?
*bridget*
that means alot emilee and i really think that no matter wat it happens to all of us and ive really stopped caring although i do wear wat i wear i realy could care less. i mean ive said this before if someone doesnt like me for me then i dont care thats not my problem.
- austin
The one above emilee is mine
Michael Knox
Bridget,
That is exaaaaccttllyyy how i feel! Even when i do just want to wear sweats, i put on makeup and straiten my hair so i feel like i madde some kind of effort in the morning. If i don't put on makeup and do my hair, my mask might fall off. Then everyone would see just Emilee. And its like ALexis said that one time. Even on pj day the girls still get "dolled up", put on their BEST pjs, and put pn makeup on so our masks don't fall off.
emilee(:
i think that she(josie) does conform to the rest of socieity just so she doesnt get made fun of but she is what mr carrol would call the bystander but she has heart and feels for the person that her bf(matt)is making fun..i feel like i sometimes conform to society but does everyone act the excact same around their parents and between their friends...since i have been in your class,mr g and ms carr, i have started to change myself for the better and it has been noticed by some of my friends but im still a human and i still make mistakes...but i try to act more like the true "john" and and no offense at all emilee or bridget i mean this in the nicest way possible..but sometime you two will wear like sweat pants and a tee and i dont think anyone has ever made fun of you(please correct me if im wrong) and im not trying to be mean and i mean it in a sincere way
John Magyar
emilee
i love the real you and i really think you are yourself most of the time because i know when u are real....anywho
i really think i am the real alot!! this summer i went to camp with paige chladek with the shawnee baptist church and it was all about transforming and not conforming and i think i t really helped me see the real me. When i tink about it last year i wore jeans as much as i could and did my hair and looked at myself and said what will my friends be wearing today? and should i wear this? last year i started coming out of my shell and being myself and i really like the real me. I would just really like to see some of my friends transform this year because this could be their last chance. Once they get to highschool their life is all going to be about conforming.
-jessica packard
emilee, yea i feel the exact same way! like even when i do put up my hair in a pony tail its still straightened and when i do wear sweats, i still put on makeup and do my hair so it can actually look like i didnt just wake up and run outside to the bus.
*bridget
Yes sometimes i do feel like Josie. Somtimes im actually afraid to talk because it seems like i open my mouth and someone always makes a smart remark and makes a big deal out of it. not to say i cant blame them thou. its like a have to play the role of the quit kid. And as to the conform part, i dont really know what conform means so i cant answer it.
Dan Hoffing
ive felt like that before, when you feel like your supposed to do or say something to please people but you dont feel like playing your part anymore because its just exausting to keep acting your part every day.
-Tyler
emilee, i feel the same way! like even when i do put my hair in a ponytail, i still straighten it and when i wear sweats, i still put on makeup and try to look good and make it look like i didnt just wake up and didnt even look in the mirror.
*bridget*
Ever since i was little i did what i thought my father wanted me to be. Which was a baseball player. He'd always push me to my limits. but now that im older i learned it doesnt really matter. If My family and friends dont except me for who i am than who cares. just be yourself.
-ROBERT-
I really like what you said Robert.If people don't excpet you for you it doesnt matter!! Good Job!!!!
Leah O.
ever since i was young i was told that if people didn't like you for you then there not really your friends and its too bad you them. so i don't put on an act when i walk in to school
- Alex Cherry
I think that most people act diffrent at home than at school.Also I think that everyone feels like Joise at one point in their life and they don't even relize it.I try to be myself as much as possible in school.Around my freinds I act like myself cause they are people who won't judge me for who I'am. And I try not to judge them. Over the last few years I think that I have started to change for the better and have really become the real me.
Big-Z
(Zach Anderson)
A couple years ago when i was in 4th grade (i think) I really cared what people thought about me. i would always think about the possible ways that i could be noticed, in the wrong way. Nowadays it dosent matter to me and i no loger act as if iam "supposedly" expected to. Now i also realize that there really wasnt anyone that was expecting me to act this way and that everyone was acting and thinking the same way as me.
-Alec
I agree with John Mag's
Big-Z
(Zach Anderson)
i really agree with what Bridget said. I think that even when i am having a really lazy day i still have to wake up early, put on a bunch of makeup and find an outfit that doesnt make me look fat or anything. I dont wanna sound like a person who cares about nothing except for the way she looks (i do care about a lot of other stuff) i just think that if i have one lazy day where i wear sweatpants, or put my hair up when i dont feel like doing it, people will look at me and say "she s ugly" or "eww". I guess it comes back to my whole self concious thing where i am EXTREMELY scared of what people will say about me.
~Autumn <33
Autumn,
Dont be afraid to show your real self. you have friends that will have you back 100% and ill catch you when you fall or need a shoulder to lean on. im alwys here for you bud(:
-nichole(:
autumn,
you wear your sweatpants girl friend!! and if anyone makes fun of you then they will gave to come up to me......because i am so mean...NOT..but i got your back autumn dont you worry!
-jessica packard
aww :) thanks jess <3
~Autumn <33
no problemo autumn!!!!
;)
-jessica
its so cool that we have never even had a conversation lasting a couple minutes and you havve my back :) thats veryyy nice! :)
~Autumn <33
no problem
yea you seem like soooo nice i just have never gotten the chance to talk
but i am 100% positive that if i got to know you that i would have your back whenever you needed it
-jessica packard
i know i feel like josie sometimes. useually i do wake up and i feel like i have to put on a mask and be someone who im not. sometime si wish i didnt have to but im afraid that someof my friends wouldnt like what was underneath it all. but there are my few best friends that are afraid of the same thing and we can just be ourselves together.
~Veronica Lee Browne~
I have deffinatly fel that way. I have 2 completely different groups of friends and i love them both but its hard sometimes to just switch who i am from gossip loving calmer girl or freak who doesnt care. I dont really know exactly who i am yet but imslowly figuring
it out
-jenna-
TEST
Dan Fink
Most of the time, I act like Josie did. I don't enjoy being told how to act and what to do. Sometimes, I am not myself. I am what people tell me to be. But mostly, the person you see in class is the person I truly am. Although, really, you can't tell. Maybe (like it said in the book)I have become something that is not me. Maybe I have been putting on an act for so long, that I am not who I was meant to be. What if I was supposed to be the steriotyped "Dumb Jock"? But because of my actions when I entered this school, I was classified as the "Wierd Geek". Who can say? I can't. It seems that who people see you as depends on the first impression you give them. So maybe the people who aren't being themselves played a part in how they are forced to act? (Please tell me if I'm not making sense)
►Dan Fink◄
Teenagers, especially girls, are way too focused on their physical apperance. Most of them feel like if they dont wake up in the morning and put on nice clothes and do their hair, that they'll be looked down upon..even if it's just for a day. Theres been days when im just tired and dont feel like doing anything with my hair. And i just wear sweatpants and a sweatshirt to school.But i dont know why i dont do that everyday. I guess its because we're all kind of afraid of what others may say about us; what others may think of us. I'm not sure if that will ever go away, but i really wish it would. it shouldnt matter how you look on the outside, or the type of clothes you wear each day to school, so why does it?
- h. garthwaite
A cool song about this is The Anthem by Good Charlotte.
The music video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=desJKYvdq9A
~Jules:)
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